The Story – the masochist

I keep asking myself why it is that I struggle to write about you, I still talk to you and that’s super easy for me to do, sometimes too easy. Closure, or a lack of it, Is that it? Am I still hung up on the age-old question of ‘what if?’ how do you make … Continue reading The Story – the masochist →

A Letter To You (I’m Happy)

You think that I am unhappy because I am living a life I once frowned upon at the age of 17, a life I had no clue could be so freeing and liberating, I was so judgemental back then. That was 10 years ago, during that time I have been chained to so many of … Continue reading A Letter To You (I’m Happy) →

for Life or just for Now?

Love, love, love… How do we know when its right? I mean besides the age old saying of, ‘when you know, you just know’ Because you see, I thought I knew before and the time before that and well I guess to some extent all the times before. I was wrong. … Continue reading for Life or just for Now? →

The Story – 17, coming out

Being officially gay was still new to me, a strange feeling that I hadn’t given much thought to before, a closeness to another human that I never knew existed and I was hooked. To feel the touch of his hands on my bare skin and his kisses down my spine, the intensity in his blue … Continue reading The Story – 17, coming out →

The Words – hypocrite

Time passed, the space between us in bed got smaller, my heart got warmer, but my mind was still out of the game. We lost some pieces of the puzzle in the rebuild and as hard as I tried I just couldn’t find them. Love existed but my mind wandered, I became vacant and mentally … Continue reading The Words – hypocrite →

The Story – keeper of secrets

I remember her holding me in the car park of the gypsy caravan site, strength on her face but heartbreak in her eyes as she told me how much she loved me. I couldn’t hold them back any longer and they began cascading down my cheeks, I watched my mum grow smaller and smaller in … Continue reading The Story – keeper of secrets →

The Story – lindor chocolate

You were wearing your faded red bed top and white boxers. None of the furniture was ours, the sofa was a tiny, hard, modern thing covered in brown suede fabric that we could hardly fit on together and the kitchen was the length of a micro oven, hotel fridge and one sink combined! Not that … Continue reading The Story – lindor chocolate →

The Story – boy from the grey

So a few months of back and forth later and I was ready, I had made the decision to leave college and make my escape from a life I truly hated, he had been driving down at weekends to stay with me but I needed more, every time he left it got harder and harder … Continue reading The Story – boy from the grey →

The Words – bathe

I bathe my bones in a bath of salt White foam bubbles through my teeth I wonder out to the place we met Sand and shells beneath my feet Seagulls cry above my head Sharks do circle around my waist I stand still in our meeting place Hollow eyes search for your face

The Book – i sank

This is a post about me, my right now. I took a break, or some may say I broke, maybe it’s both? life got in the way or maybe it was a lack of life? Who knows, either way I needed to stop. Writing and putting this book together has not been easy, I dug … Continue reading The Book – i sank →